What A Pity London Isn’t Islamic (Yet)

A quote (not a joke) from Michael Hodges in Time Out London, 5 June 2007

An Islamic London would be a better place. [...] Alcohol is haram, or forbidden, to Muslims. As London is above the national average for alcohol-related deaths in males [...] turning all the city’s pubs into juice bars would have a massive positive effect on public health. [...]

‘The world is green and beautiful,’ said the prophet Muhammad, ‘and Allah has appointed you his guardian over it.’ The Islamic concept of halifa or trusteeship obliges Muslims to look after the natural world and Muhammad was one of the first ever environmentalists, advocating hima – areas where wildlife and forestry are protected. So we could expect more public parks under Islam [...]

If Islam became the dominant religion in London [...] this could have a revolutionary effect on educational achievement and, perhaps just as importantly, general levels of discipline and self-respect among London’s young people. [...]
 
Application of halal (Arabic for ‘permissable’) dietary laws across London would free us at a stroke from our addiction to junk food, [...]

Each Muslim is obliged to pay zakat, a welfare tax of 2.5 per cent of annual income, that is distributed to the poor and the needy. If the working population of London, 5.2 million, was predominantly Muslim this would produce approximately £3.2bn each year. More importantly, everyone would be obliged to consider those Londoners who haven’t shared their good fortune. London would become a little less cruel.

 

Does Magna Carta mean nothing to you?

Brilliant! But this IS a joke,right? A long lost Galton and Simpson sketch? In fact,I think the best response to the ahistorical ramblings of Michael Hodges would be to quote the words of the late,great British comedian,Tony Hancock:

'I shall not go through the facts of this case again,save to suggest to you that there is some doubt in this...

Take the case of Doubting Thomas,who was sent to Coventry for looking through a keyhole at Lady Godiva.Can anybody prove he was looking at HER? Can anybody prove it was he who shouted out "get your hair cut"? Of course not,this is sheer supposition! Does Magna Carta mean nothing to you? Did she die in vain? Brave Hungarian peasant girl who forced King John to sign the pledge at Runnymede and close the boozers at half past ten! Is all this to be forgotten?

Of course,Tony Hancock was a comedic genius,while Michael Hodges -one assumes- is a serious journalist.So,serious journalist,here is an apposite  exit question from Tony Hancock from beyond the grave:

 

Does The Pact of Omar mean nothing to you? 

 

Communism, Fascism or Islam: whatever does the trick

During the twentieth century, the Left embraced totalitarian ideologies claiming to have science, logic and justice on their side and universal human prosperity as their goals. Of course, rational people realized that totalitarianism and collectivism can achieve nothing but universal poverty, endless violence and the end of technological progress, but at least Socialism, Communism and Fascism pretended to be Modern. Now, after the intellectual collapse of Communism and the destruction of Fascism and all the other variations of “scientific” Collectivism, the supposedly secular Left has dropped all pretense of Modernism and is embracing one of the most primitive and oppressive religions ever devised. Why? Wouldn’t this seem to be contradictory?

Actually, it is completely consistent. The main goal of all Leftist ideologies is the destruction of Individualism and the unspoken desire is for an end to progress. Deep down inside, all Leftists long for slavery and stagnation. Their goal is simply the destruction of Western Civilization, and whichever ideology will do the trick is good enough. How else can you explain the surrender of the Left in Britain to Islam, as evidenced by an article like the one above?

Well put rand51

But, I think Mark Steyn's vision of the future in Europe is more likely to come to pass. That is a Europe which looks like Bosnia or Israel, where Muslims and ethnic Europeans are geographically separated into well-armed sub-regions. A low-level state of warfare will prevail, where the combatants operate independently rather than under the control of national governments. National and European governments will exhibit limited authority.

Leftists who today admire Islam will be forced to make a decision: convert to Islam or join with the ethnic European entities. I believe we have already begun to see some leftists choose the former path. We have also seen the rise of Vlaams and BNP, which are the precusors of ethnic European militias.

Another Perspective

On the face of it, this article appears disgusting and borders on treason. However, I actually read it differently. I detected a degree of subtle disdain when the author noted how Islam and Muslims fared poorly in different areas but that this was resolvable (according to Muslim interviewees) by establishing Shari'a Law i.e. education, prosperity, crime, etc., which would conceivably boost performance. Perhaps I'm wrong?

A classic in the genre!!!!!!

This thing beats everything I've ever read. The skill with which this guy contrasts all the hyperbolic claims about Islam (including one of my absolute favourites: Eco-Muhammad -- sadly lacking, though, is Muhammad The First Feminist) with shameless self-congratulation for his own insight, makes this piece a classic in the genre. Especially considering that it's written for a lifestyle magazine, the most vacuous of all magazines.

Like when he describes what is essentially a (cleaned up) execution scene from current day Riyadh, but then tries to surprise us: it's actually "a hysterical, right-wing nightmare"... Oh no! He made it all up to fool us! That's not what sharia in London would look like at all! Or when he derides the "often ill-informed press" only to celebrate his own expertise and ability to look beyond the surface of things. Once behind this surface, we can find out for instance that the Muslim prayer was actually designed to be like Jane Fonda's Workout. Bet you didn't see that one coming!!

What's also funny are the many meticulously researched facts and statistics about various uh... facts. With these numbers, he removes any doubt about whether he's a great comedian or a dead serious retard. I can already imagine the author, a hard worker, nice chap, well-groomed but just not terribly bright, leaning back in his chair, satisfied after having worked quite hard on this article, thinking he finally did something good for the city. I hope we'll be hearing more from this guy and that the blogosphere will keep track of him. He's a freakin' genius!!!

...Yet?

The notion of London being Islamic seems ludricous if seen from the heyday of Hilaire Belloc and G. K. Chesterton. But which would either look with more favor upon, shariah or sex shops? the Prophet's beard or the neo-pagan? the imams or the EU commisioners?

Perhaps, just perhaps, Christendom needs the chastisement that Israel needed with the Babylonian Captivity for 60 years or so. It may clear away the rif-raf and make us realize what is truth, goodness, and beauty. And learn to fight for it with chivalry, honor, and the Faith.

How about this????

But which would either look with more favor upon, shariah or sex shops? the Prophet's beard or the neo-pagan? the imams or the EU commisioners?

How about a constitutional representative republic with a moderate secular democratically elected governement who's laws, roots, and establishments are based on moderate Judeo-Christian philosopy and theology, and with political parties that are middle of the road when it comes to policies and issues, that permits people from other parts of the world to permanently inhabit it's land on the conditions that they integrate into the culture and legally become citizens? Whatever happened to that?

@ oiznop

The vexing truth is that America probably WILL try to rescue Europe again, at great cost to us politically, financially, and -- most important, obviously -- in blood.  The stupider the European elites become, the more certain is our future involvement in resolving their problems of dhimmitude.

This guy is the classic Dhimmi!

It really sounds to me like he want's his country to fall to Islam.  These liberal PC idiot journalists better be careful what they wish for.  Because we (meaning the USA) will not come to your rescue again. We have our own problems! Oh, and by the way, anytime some Muzzoid trys to tell me I can't have a pint in a pub, is the day that I go and get my malitia organized! And another thing. Regarding this statement: London would become a little less cruel" Yeah, that is unless of course you are Jewish or Christian or like music!  What a moron! Wake up UK and Europe! The Looney Left and the Islamo-Goons are going to destroy your society if you don't act soon!

"turning all the city’s

"turning all the city’s pubs into juice bars would have a massive positive effect on public health"

Except for those of us who can't handle all of that sugar! I don't suppose I'm going into the "juice pub" for dinner.

"this could have a revolutionary effect on educational achievement"

For men. The rest of us would be stuck at home on house arrest.

" this could have a revolutionary effect on ... general levels of discipline and self-respect among London’s young people"

Oh, yes, that is what we see all over the Muslim world ~ the street riots and effigy burnings every time something happens they don't like. Certainly the cartoon riots were a show of discipline and self-respect !!

"If the working population of London, 5.2 million, "

Oh, we must remember to cut that calculation in half ~ again, b/c half the population would be at home on house arrest.

ARRGGGHHHHHHH!

Hodges

By analogy, Hodges should be a fervent supporter of National Socialism.

Joke or what?

I can tell five anecdotes on each of the above issues to disprove all of them, and that is just from observations on my holiday to one islamic country (Morocco). The above is all either a joke or islamic self-delusion.

Taqiya involves lying to and deceiving infidels. What is the word for the islamic concept of lying to and deceiving themselves?

_____

Defend Christendom. Defend Jewry. Oppose socialism in Europe.

Do you believe me or your lying eyes?

I don't know if the article is supposed to be some kind of joke, but if it's serious, its disconnection with reality is serious.

I mean, just look at any Muslim country, for Chrissakes: is it "ecological"? Is there "racial harmony"? Are people "healthier" and "more generous"?

Whatever one's interpretation of islamic principles, it is quite clear (except for idiots) that they don't work in practice.